What Are You Refusing to See?

September 18th, 2013 by Laura Longley

I have a lot of dreams. Frequently they are pretty intense. A few days ago I had one of those intense ones that I knew I needed to process as soon as I woke up.

There were a number of messages in that dream, but one that really stood out for me was about how I was refusing to see reality, and why.

What I came to see was true for me were a couple of things:

1.  I believed that in order to make it to the top (to succeed) I had to ignore certain truths. That certainly sets me up for quite a conflict, as a big part of what I believe and what I espouse is that it is important to speak your truth. So, logically, I can’t be successful (in my belief system) as long as I am speaking my truth. What showed up in the dream was a fear of being blamed, of getting in trouble for causing a problem that really did not belong to me.

Of course I want to be successful, we all do – and I don’t want to ignore or hide what is true. So I need to work on shifting my belief about ignoring certain truths in order to be successful.

2.  Another thing I realized about seeing the truth was more specific: I need to become a vegan.

I have been a vegetarian for almost two years. I felt guided to do so by Spirit – it was not a considered decision. I just knew I was supposed to. The reason I’m a vegetarian is because of the inhumane way in which food animals are treated. Once I was willing to actually think about the truth of this, I really had no choice.

But, I rationalized and justified eating eggs and dairy in that animals are not killed. I bought free-range eggs and hormone-free dairy products. There. The animals were fine. Um…no. About a week before I had this dream I met a woman who has been vegan for more than 30 years. She told me some things I really didn’t want to hear about how animals are treated in the dairy and egg industry.

I’m sure this is not always the case, but I’m also willing to bet it is the vast majority of the time. It’s no coincidence that less than a week later I had a dream about looking at what is true. When I acknowledge what is true for chickens and cows, I have to become a vegan.

I was only able to eat animals for the majority of my life by choosing not to look at where the piece of meat on my plate came from. I obviously somehow reached a place where I could not ignore that any more.

3.  The third realization I had from this message about ignoring the truth in my dream is that a large reason I choose to look away from the truth, or run away from experiences, is because I’m afraid that I will not be strong enough to stand up and do the right thing.

Along with this fear, is the fear that I am too “fragile.” That I will be permanently scarred, never to recover, if I allow myself to know the truth about difficult situations.

I came to realize through this dream that I am not being true to myself when I do this. I don’t have to immerse myself in an awful situation – for instance I don’t need to watch video of animals being slaughtered – but I do have to acknowledge the truth of the situation. Then I can make an appropriate decision about what (if anything) I want to do about it. Hiding my head like an ostrich doesn’t help the situation, or me. It just makes me feel bad about myself (reference the fear that I am not strong enough to handle it).

So. What are you refusing to see? And how is it affecting your ability to be authentic and true to yourself?

I don’t expect you to have the same issues as I do, but we all have at least moments where we deny or ignore the truth. What are yours?

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